Tuesday, May 12, 2009

Too Soon Old, Too Late Smart





I've been having a difficult time lately. No energy, no motivation, just don't feel good, allergy/sinus headache, ears stopped up and severe pain in feet, knees, hip and lower back (most joints). Well, you might say, what's the problem? I've been trying to figure it out. I've considered everything from rejection to arthritis to who knows.

Had several days recently that I had to be up somewhat early and it's hard for me to get going in the morning. Sometimes I've found it helpful to only take one amitriptyline at night and I can wake up easier. The amitriptyline is used to enable me to attain stage 4 sleep which is the restful and restorative sleep. If you don't attain stage 4 sleep, you may sleep the night through but you won't feel like you slept at all. It's that "feel like I've been run over by a truck" feeling. This is one of my major difficulties with fibromyalgia. Stay up all night for three nights in a row and you will understand the feeling.

We've been dwelling on the kidney transplant and the balancing of everything from that point of view that I haven't thought a lot about any other problems. Finally, the light came on last night when my hubby was bringing me my meds and he asked if I wanted one or two ametriptyline. I said, "TWO! I'm not even going to get up tomorrow!" That's when the light came on.

Emily and I went shopping yesterday and were excited about finally having a whole day to ourselves. I only took one pill so I could get up and I had done that several days in a row. I was tired when I got up but expected things to pick up as the day went on, but it didn't. It just got worse and worse and worse. Just let me die! So, I took the two pills, went to bed earlier than usual, and I think maybe I did die for awhile. No, I didn't sleep late. Woke up early for me and couldn't go back to sleep so I got up. I am feeling better, however, and know with a few more such nights I will be as good as new. I consider a lesson learned. It's time I took things in hand. (No snide remarks from the peanut gallery, please.) Sigh! It's going to be a good day. ~Later

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